Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Vagina MOMologue

While absentmindedly folding laundry and Uhuh'ing and Mmhmm'ing my way through a barrage of questions being thrown at me from a 6 year old, I snapped out of it just in time to realize that I was either about to go down a road of "Big Fat Lie," or "Conversation I Don't Really Want to Have Right Now.."

While the Big Fat Lie sounded nice, I couldn't bring myself to do it, so I put on my big girl panties and answered her questions honestly. After re-telling this to the husband last night, he decided we're either going to be the best parents ever, or screw our kids up beyond repair, you decide.

The Munchkin has always asked about how babies come out of a Mommy's Tummy. Because I have a scar from the twins c-section, the story just kind of told itself. The Dr. cut my tummy, and pulled the twins out, I guess she just assumed that's how she came out too.

While throwing questions at me yesterday she said, "did the Dr. cut a hole in your tummy to get us out?" I replied that it wasn't really a "hole," more like a small cut that opened up big enough to get a baby out - "So, that's how the Dr. pulled me out of your tummy?"

*Lie, Lie, Lie, Lie*

"Well, not exactly. There is another way that a baby can come out of the Mommy...."

Munchkin: How?

Me: Well..... The other way to have a baby, is from your vagina...

Munchkin: Your VAGINA! From Here? (Points to her lower stomach.)

Me: No, not exactly

Munchkin: Here...? (Points a little lower, but still nowhere in the same zipcode)

Me: Well... No..

Munchkin: Then, where?

Me: (Please ground open up and swallow me. No? Okay, then.. Here goes nothing...) Kind of like where your tee-tee comes out.... *cringe, hold breath*

Munchkin: *Silence*

Me: "It's something that you will learn more about as you get older, and you'll understand it more when...

At that point she threw her hand in air and waved me off mid sentence, while saying... "Oh! I got it..." and walked away.

I'm guessing she will be discussing this on the playground with her peers today. "My Mom said babies come out with your tee-tee in your vagina.... "

Shoot me.



1 comment:

Rachel said...

Sounds like you did good to me... and I'm so thankful that I had ALL C-Sections - at least for now, that answer is always working.