Monday, March 26, 2012

Fat Man, Little Stall...

I don't know what it is about Chick-Fil-A that drives my children to embarrass me in ways I've never been embarrassed before, but somehow it continues to happen.

Friday, different location, different twin.

We were hanging out with some friends when "Mary Kate" came running out of the play area holding herself, screaming that she needed to pee - and from the looks of it, may or may not make it to the restroom.

I whisked her away and headed to the ladies bathroom to find both stalls occupied. I set her down and told her to hold it for just another minute. Not believing that both stalls were full, she proceeded to bend down and look underneath the door. I told her to stop, that it wasn't polite to look under stall doors. She asked why, and I explained that someone was in there going potty, and would like to do so with some privacy.

The rest of the conversation went like this:

MK: Who Needs Privacy?

Me: The person in the stall

MK: Oh, the BIG FAT MAN in there?

Me: Oh Shit - Shhhhh...  This is the ladies restroom.

MK: Well, that's a BIG FAT MAN in there...

BIG FAT MAN Lady In the Stall: *Chuckles Uncomfortably* and yells "Well, Thanks"

Me: Sorry!

But wait, there's more!

While many children would consider their work for humiliating their Parent complete at that point, not my child.

As we stood there waiting patiently and I tried to figure out how to actually will the ground to open up and swallow me, "Big Fat Man" (who was actually a large overweight women with very short hair) was the first one out of her stall, of course. I managed another weak "sorry" and she said, "Doesn't bother me any.."

We proceeded to try and cram ourselves into this too-small-for one-person-much-less-two-stall, when "Mary Kate" began to explain to me that we should fit, because the BIG FAT MAN did...

*Close Curtain*






1 comment:

Rachel @ Grasping for Objectivity said...

Oh. My. Goodness.

Thank you for the laugh!!

(And I feel your pain.)