Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Like You Don't Know...

Being that I'm a complete and total reality television junkie, I have a hard time tuning away even when a series is completely tired and redundant. This goes for the Bachelor 16.

While I think Ben seems like a nice guy, I don't get the physical attraction. The hair is bad. Like really, really bad. The girls are of course beautiful and thin. Same as seasons 1-15.  They even manage to consistently throw in several crazies. I'm guessing this is a requirement.

Also required for each season:

1. On the first night, someone (or multiple someones) are going to get wasted and make complete and total fools of themselves, have crazy eyes and lock themselves in a bathroom crying.

2. The bitchy villain will always make it way farther than she should, in this case to the final 2. This also applies to the Bachelorette.

3. Someone who you think to be somewhat normal will turn batshit crazy on her "kicked to the curb" limo ride home when she doesn't get a rose.

The bickering, catty-ness, tattle-telling and back stabbing are all standard, but my absolute favorite is when the Fantasy Date Card arrives.

We all know it by heart:

The Bachelor "covertly" pulls envelope from pocket, Girl Du Jour is all... "Wha.. Wha.. a card that's going to ask me to spend the night in a fantasy suite.. What?"

While playing coy, she reads:

{Insert Bachelor Name and the "Girl Du Jour"}

We hope you are enjoying your stay in {Insert City/Country}

Should you choose to fore go your individual rooms, please use this key to stay as a couple in the fantasy suite.


"Girl Du Jour" then acts all proper, like she's actually considering saying no... *snort* As If! It's the Bachelor 16!! SIXTEEN, People! Do think that any of us buy your terrible acting job and the fact that you wouldn't jump on the chance to get a little sexy time without the cameras rolling?


I would love nothing more than for some girl (or guy) to just own it. To wave off dinner and the envelope and ask "So, are we gonna do it, or what?"

That would make for good tv. I'm just sayin'

America's sweetheart Emily Maynard will be back as the next Bachelorette and I of course will tune in.. How could you not after all of the Emily/Whack Job Brad after season drama?

I wonder if this good girl will change the rules up when it comes to the fantasy suite... Don't forget to set a good example, Emily. Your daughter will see this one day!

Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Happy Belated Day O' Love

Since Pukefest 2012 hit during Valentine's week, all of our celebrations were deferred to this week.

Happy Belated Valentine's Day!

Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Pukefest 2012

It all started in the early morning hours. One twinlet up, puking in her bed, screaming from the upstairs.

As the sleepless hours ticked on, the vomiting continued and it was apparent that we had a serious stomach bug on our hands and could only hope (delusionally) that it wouldn't spread through the house like wildfire.

Of course we were delusional. By Tuesday morning, twinlet 2, the Munchkin and myself were hit, and the husband had to be home to man the puke buckets that were being filled every 30 minutes.

As the week wore on, one by one we started regaining our strength, until Thursday. The husband came home early clearly infected and down for the count. I was back in charge, operating at about 70%. Not really how you want to be when dealing with your kids puke and butt pee.

All in all it took a full week start to finish to make it's way through the household. I'm slowly but surely putting my house back together. I'm lysoling everything and am so thankful the weather is warm enough to open the windows and doors to air the place out!

I survived Pukefest 2012 - Where's my damn t-shirt?

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

My Skin Care Revolution

If you follow this blog even a little, you probably know that I'm not much on New Year's Resolutions. And while I have vowed this year to lose weight, it's more of a Holy-Crap-!!!-I'm-getting-closer-to-40-and-need-to-start-taking-better-care-of-myself-resolution. Part of this resolution has me getting more serious with my skin care.

I will brag a bit and say that I was pretty much blessed with good skin. I've abused it over the years with tanning beds, long days in the sun with absolutely no sunscreen, and a poor, poor cleaning regimen that consisted of bar soap in the shower. But still, my skin was good.

Now the tides are turning and the abuse is starting to catch up. I'm getting closer to 40 (did I mention that?) and the "laugh lines" are starting to form. When I get in the sun, I get spots. It's payback time.

While acne has never really been an issue, minus a big zit or two and the absolute most inopportune times, I've been seeking out all types of info dedicated to skin care, from simple lotions, washes and rinses to the more serious injections and Anti-Aging Light Therapy Treatments.

I think for now, I'm going to commit to just washing my face daily, that should be a no-brainer right? Maybe a good anti-wrinkle cream and conditioner (with sunscreen, of course) and see how far that gets me. As I edge a little closer to 40, we'll see just how pissed off my skin is for all the years of neglect and we'll re-evaluate the steps needed to help me find my fountain of youth.

Sunday, February 12, 2012


After an 8 month hiatus and 2 weeks of not losing a single effing pound, I decided that it was time to climb back up on the saddle again and get to a spin class.

I've got a great spinning partner. One that I had not actually seen in a while, but over lunch a few weeks ago we reconnected and starting reminising about the great spin classes we used to do, back when we worked together and before I had kiddos.. Yes! It was a while ago, (circa 2004?) but the classes were THAT good. We were actually spoiled, and while I have been it lots of classes since then, many of them very good, nothing compares to THOSE classes. Everything about them just worked. The instructor, the music and the regular group of "riders." We all clicked, and we held each other accountable. We were obsessed.

So after mentioning that she was starting spin classes again at the Y, I knew I had to go with her. Thursday night was my first class back and the only word to describe the pain of being back in the saddle again is "Vag-Agony." That first ride back is always brutal. While my legs will hurt as a result, it's nothing compared to my ass and va-jay-jay. I know it wouldn't be so bad if I would give in to the padded shorts, but after trying on multiple pairs, the unflattery and my vanity won out and I decided I would rather suffer the Vag-Agony than walk around in those padded shorts. Maybe once I reach my goal weight I'll re-visit that issue, but until then, the vag will step up to the challenge and make it work!

Being back in spin class feels great! Can't wait for this week, Vag-Agony and all!

Thursday, February 09, 2012

When I'm the Boss of Me.

We always play around with the girls telling them they have to listen to us because "we're the boss," and when they grow up, they will be their own boss and can do whatever they want.

This typically leads to a long conversation about all of the things they will be able to do when they are the boss of themselves.

Earlier this week, "Mary Kate" was quite curious of what her freedom would be like as a grown up. So she bombarded me with scenarios... It ended by melting my heart.

When I'm the Boss of me:

Will I be able to jump on the bed?


Stay up as late as I want?

Yes, Ma'am.

Watch cartoons ALL Day?

If you want to.

Eat Candy anytime?


Can I drink out of any cup I want to, like my princess cup?

Any cup you want.

But, Mommy? I can't reach the cups....

Tuesday, February 07, 2012

Sleep is for the Weak.

Sleep deprivation is not just for Moms with infants... apparently.

The twins are going through a phase that I'm sure the Munchkin went through, but it seems magnified when there are two going through it at the same time.

We are in this weird in-between stage where they are just about out of napping, but can't quite make it to bedtime without one. Well, they can, but it results in tears from everyone in the house. Them, me, the Munchkin, me... We've always called it the "Witching Hour," only I thought that it was something we out grew, and we did, for a while.

Now, we're back.

If they don't take a nap, the upside is that it results in an early bedtime. The downside is that in order to get there the meltdowns are tenfold. The fighting? Out of control. Everyone is hyper sensitive, cranky and just downright miserable.

If they take a nap, the upside is that I get about 2 hours of "me" time in the afternoon. I use it to do laundry, clean the house and catch up on DVR. The downside is that they NEVER. GO. TO. BED. At 10pm they'll still be bouncing around the upstairs, talking, singing, coming down for a sip of water and nothing will suck the sexy out of your marriage like almost 4 year old's coming down the stairs interrupting you every 5 minutes.

In addition to the napping/going to bed issues, they get up early. Like, really early. So early that I'm beginning to question whether or not they actually came from my body. I like to sleep and consider anything before 7am stupid. I understand that it's a must, being a grown up and all, but you can bet I'm going to try for every last second of sleep I can get.  For the twinlets anytime between the hours of 4am and 6am is fair game. So incredibly uncool. And we mustn't forget the 2am freak outs.  (Did I mention we're also having attachment issues?)

All of this and a husband who snores. I deserve a medal.

How does a sleep loving Mom like myself catch a few extra z's? Sleep deprived Moms want to know.

Saturday, February 04, 2012

Komen's Epic Fail

Boy am I glad I don't run PR for the Susan G. Komen Foundation. This past week has been nothing but a complete and total debacle.

First, pulling it's funding from Planned Parenthood because of an investigation launched by Republican Rep. Cliff Stearns, a hard core anti-choice member of congress.

After feeling a shit ton of heat, SGK backed down stating:

"We want to apologize to the American public for recent decisions that cast doubt upon our commitment to our mission of saving women's lives. 

The events of this week have been deeply unsettling for our supporters, partners and friends and all of us at Susan G. Komen. We have been distressed at the presumption that the changes made to our funding criteria were done for political reasons or to specifically penalize Planned Parenthood. They were not."  (Right. Got it.)

Anyway.. So, now they have reversed their decision and things have gone back to the way they were before, right? Wrong. Oh, so wrong.

All they have done is alert people (who didn't take time to research,) to what they actually do with their money. Facebook is now a flutter with all of the anti-choicers pissed off because they didn't know that when they raised money and showed up to "Race for the Cure," they were actually supporting abortion.

They're dropping like flies Komen, I believe this is what you call a lose/lose situation.

Friday, February 03, 2012


I have a confession to make. I'm slightly obsessed with dinosaurs (and Alcatraz, but that's a whole other post) and I'm completely giddy that the Munchkin has been learning about them in school, she is also becoming obsessed with dino's, their history, and how they met their great demise.

She is thirsty for knowledge and we have been spending our afternoons and evenings googling random facts about Dinosaurs.

Did you know...

Dinosaurs have been found in 35 states?

Did you also know that the Brontosaurus never actually existed?  When it was discovered, it was believed to be a different species than the Apatosaurus. In 1903 scientists realized that both dinosaurs where the same so they went back to calling it Apatosaurus.

(Do you really care?)

Google is so much easier than hitting up the library like I had to do in the good ol' days.

I don't geek out on many things, but Dinosaurs fascinate me.

This has also prompted me to start researching what Christians believe when it comes to Dinosaurs. The Husband and I were talking about it the other night, we were stumped. While I think most Christians believe that they existed, their time frame seems to be skewed as to what the scientists believe... It also varies greatly from Christian to Christian,  this also fascinates me.

If you're a Christian reading this post, what are your thoughts on Dinosaurs and when/if they existed? I would love to hear your views.