Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Pay it Forward... or Backward

Tis' the Season for giving. I like it. Not just the getting part, but giving makes me happy too.

The smallest of things are great examples, like using the extra change in my console to drop in the red Salvation Army kettles or watching my kids get excited about doing it for me. We've bought toys for kids in need and dropped those off, in hopes of teaching my Children a lesson in giving and just as importantly, helping make Christmas morning happy for someone who isn't as fortunate as we are.

Over the past month or so I've been the recipient of several random drive thru giving sprees, having the car in front of me buy my coffee or in 2 separate cases,  pick up my bill for lunch in the drive thru when I had just ordered 3 kids meals. Each time it surprises me. The fact that some stranger would buy a meal (or 3) for a person they can only see in their rear view mirror.  

The first time it happened I was so shocked I didn't think fast enough to "Pay it Backwards" but after that time, I knew that I needed to at some point. So the next day at Starbucks I bought the coffee for the car behind me. I smiled thinking about the reaction on their face as I drove away.

I was caught up in a multi-car giving spree one day at the coffee shop, The person in front of me buying mine, me buying the one behind.. The girl working the window said I was about the 5th one in the chain and sometimes they just get on a roll... Since that day, I've decided that at least once a week I'm going to buy coffee for the car behind me in hopes of being the start of the chain.

So next time you're in line at the drive thru (or anywhere really) I encourage you to pick up the tab for someone behind you. You'll be amazed at how happy it will make you feel.

Tuesday, November 06, 2012

In Trouble at the Polls

The cutest little "blue dots you ever did see.
We've been trying to involve our kids in the voting process as much as possible and in ways they can comprehend. Going to vote with me was a no-brainer. I think it sets good habits for their future and shows them that we care enough to try and make our voice heard.

So this morning, we got up, got ready and headed out. It's super convenient for us that I vote at the Munchkins school (you know I love to multi-task.) My girls were excited to wear their Obama buttons and I had on my Obama shirt.

Quite honestly I was a little nervous about the reaction I might receive from some of the people in my own community. Especially when getting to the school means walking down Romney/Ryan Row. But the more I thought about it, the more I thought, who gives a shit? I'm proud of who I'm voting for and I clearly don't have a problem talking about it behind this keyboard.

We got to the polls and the Munchkin was excited. Asking lots of questions and desperately hoping we got to go behind a "curtain." (I'm guessing she envisioned a very Wizard of Oz type scenario.)  She saw friends and waved, I saw Moms and said Hi. The Mom of the Munchkins best friend said she loved my shirt, I sighed in relief, thinking maybe we can be better friends..

As we approached the table to sign in, the lady looking at licenses looked at "Ashley" and asked if she was there to help Mommy vote. "Ashley" beamed and proudly pulled her jacket aside and showed the lady her Obama button, to which the lady replied: "You're not allowed to have that on, you need to cover it up...."

I was stunned. Literally speechless, as I stood there in my OBAMA SHIRT with nothing being said to me.


At that point I watched my 4 year olds little face deflate, feeling like she got caught doing something wrong.

When I replied to the lady "Seriously?"

She looked and me and said:" It's not her fault, she didn't know.. "


I told the lady that apparently neither did I as I walked off with my ballot.  It was then when I realized that the 7 year old had ducked behind me and took her button off too, afraid that she was going to get in trouble.

After we voted I took the girls outside and explained to them that they did nothing wrong and should never be embarrassed about who they're voting for or what they believe in. But it's too late. That will be my oldest daughters first memory of voting. Getting in trouble for supporting our candidate.

As the morning goes on, I can't help but think of about 100 other things I would have liked to have said to that lady.  I can't help but wonder if the button had been Romney/Ryan, would she have said anything at all?

My daughter is 4. Obviously not a Candidate. She wasn't walking around showing people her button. In fact it WAS covered up until the lady spoke to her.

Why not call me out on my shirt?

I've been googling trying to figure out the "rules" to voting day "paraphernalia," but it's sketchy and not real clear. Even if it's not ok.. What about my right to freedom of speech? Shouldn't that apply here, especially on election day?

Wednesday, October 31, 2012

From Slut to House Elf. The New Spirit of Halloween.

It's no secret that Halloween provides girls with the perfect opportunity to dress like a slut. Until you become a Mom.

I've been there. 

This was me, then. A Stripper.

 This is me, now. A House Elf.

Ain't Life Grand?

Happy Halloween!

Monday, October 29, 2012

A Very Potter Halloween

We always wait until a couple of days before Halloween to carve our pumpkins. It seems to always be the exact day when the temperature drops and it's as cold as balls outside. But when I say "we" carve the pumpkin, I totally mean the Husband and the kids. And yes, I make them go outside, in the cold. I don't need that goop all over my kitchen.

If it weren't for him and his ability to watch 3 children, while using sharp objects to cut through a giant fruit (botanically speaking it's a fruit, I googled it) we wouldn't carve pumpkins. It's just not my thang.

So, we're a little Potter obsessed this Halloween and since a couple of our costumes are Potter themed, we decided (I decided and told the Husband) to try a Harry Potter Pumpkin. Looks good, I think.

Good, Daddy.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Truth. Dare. Hell. No.

My seven year old came home yesterday excited to tell me about a new game she played with her friends at school. When I asked and she replied "Truth or Dare, have you heard of it?" I stopped dead in my tracks, knowing this was one of those subjects I was going to need to explore, but didn't want to. All of the worst possible scenarios started rushing through my brain. Don't act like you don't know.

I started asking questions, treading very lightly as to not make her clam up. At the first sign or feeling that she's getting in trouble for something, she shuts down and begins to modify her stories. She's going to make a great teenager.

So I asked, (nonchalantly of course)

"Oh yeah? Who did you play with?"  Please don't say older boys on the playground..

"I've heard of that game, what kind of things were your truths..." Meh. How many skeletons can she possibly have, I'm more concerned with the dares at this point...

"Did anyone dare you? What was the dare..." Please say you ate a booger...

Oh! They dared you to walk across a balance beam? Ok.

She must have noticed the relief in my voice because then she stopped, looked at me and asked:

"Why? Isn't that how you used to play it?"

My reply?  "Oh yes. Absolutely. Exactly like we used to play it."

So. Sue me.

Friday, October 19, 2012

If You Don't Like It, Delete It.

The twins get nosebleeds. A lot. A while back when we were having a pretty tough run with one or both of them getting nose bleeds just about every night, I implemented a rule that they could only have 5 things in their beds. 5 pillows, 5 stuffed animals, 5 babies or a combination of the 3, as long as they had no more than 5. Changing the sheets everyday is bad enough when you aren't having to wade through 37 things on each bed.

While putting sheets back on the bed yesterday, I realized things had accumulated again. In a fit of frustration trying to work around her stash, I asked "Mary Kate" what happened to our rule of 5? Out of the blue "Ashley" wandered in and joined the conversation.

Me to Mary Kate: "What happened to our rule of only 5 things on the bed?"

Mary Kate: *Silent* *Blink Blink*

Ashley: "What? That Rule? We deleted it."

Me: "You deleted it, huh?"

Ashley: "Uh-Huh. We didn't like it, so we deleted it"

Me: "Is that so?"

Ashley: "Yup..... Deleted."

Mary Kate: " *Sigh* Now, can you put my animals back on my bed?"

If only it were that easy to do away with the things I don't like!

Monday, October 15, 2012

A Twinlet Switcheroo. Age 4

And so it begins.

On Saturday the family was sitting around eating lunch. Half way through, "Ashley" decided she didn't want to eat anymore, but had not even touched her sandwich. After explaining to her that she had to eat her sandwich in order to go play, an emotional breakdown commenced. It was made worse as her sisters finished and resumed playtime without her.

After listening to her for about 5 minutes, I explained again that she was going to sit there until she finished and crying wasn't going to help. Fast forward another 5 minutes or so and "Mary Kate" started getting all "twin-like" and concerned about her other half. She then wanted to help her sister, asking if she could go in there. I told her she was welcome to keep her company but "Ashley" had to eat her own sandwich. Everyone said they understood, so I headed back to to watch the Auburn game. (Why? I have no idea. That's another post, another time)

After a bit, I realized that I hadn't heard any complaining or whining so I went to investigate. As I rounded the corner, I glanced into the living room and saw Munchkin sitting on the sofa watching a movie on the ipad, a twin to her right. That twin was holding "Mary Kate's" Lovey. I went on into the kitchen and saw a twin from behind, eating "Ashley's" sandwich. Only something was amiss.

The wrong twin was on the sofa with the Lovey.

The wrong twin was eating the sandwich.

The twins had attempted to fool me. Propping "Ashley" on the sofa with "Mary Kate's" Lovey and "Mary Kate" was polishing off her 2nd sandwich, to help her sister earn her way out of the kitchen.

Follow me? They knowingly swapped roles. They're 4.

When I confronted the sandwich eater, she simply replied: "It would have worked if I had on her shirt." What!? They're 4.


Friday, September 21, 2012

Go Get Ready..

I tell the twinlets to go get ready, this is what I get.

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Never Tell a 7 Year Old Your Diet Plan...

In a frustrated rant over my ever present inability to lose weight, I declared with absolute determination that I would not go to Starbucks again until I lost 5lbs.

This proclalimation was two-fold. Don't go get a 6000 calorie white mocha with whip, lose weight. Lose weight, reward self with 6000 calorie white mocha.

Seemed like a great tool for motivation.

Only I have no will power.

After a couple of days the next day when I caved and l started loading the girls into the car, Munchkin asked where we were going. When I told her Mommy needed a coffee, she asked (with her hand on her hip and her head to the side, tapping her foot) "And how many pounds have you lost.....?"

Awesome. Not only do I have the voice in my head telling me I shouldn't be drinking that Mocha, I now have a 7 year old keeping tabs on my habits too.

Sunday, September 09, 2012

Desperately Seeking a New NFL Team

I've been a Miami Dolphins fan since I was a little girl. Not sure why I picked that team, but they've always been "my team." Over the past several years, they have progressively sucked the fun out of Sunday Football. I've been with them through the good, the bad and whatever it is that they are now.

So, the time has come for me to get excited about Sunday Football again. In order to do that I'm going to need another team to cheer for. A team that will actually have a winning season.

I'm not jumping ship on my Dolphins, I will always pull for them regardless of who they play, even when they play my "new team." No new team will ever take their place. In picking a new team, this condition is non-negotiable.

Over the past week I've been pondering my options. The husband has been lobbying hard. Here is what I've come up with:

  • Go back to the 49'ers. I've liked them since I was a little girl, too. Mostly because I loved Joe Montana. Even if he did when his 2nd Super Bowl at the expense of my Dolphins. He was a great Quaterback, They're a good legacy team.
  • Pick a team that's as local as possible: Falcons, Titans, Saints, Panthers, Jaguars (maybe) - Of course for an Auburn fan the Panthers would be the obvious choice. But husband argues that you shouldn't make an expansion team, "your team." Plus, what happens when Cam gets traded?
  • Ok. So, expansion teams are out and that leaves me with the Falcons or the Saints, if I want to stay somewhat regional. I really don't know why, but I can't see myself as a Falcons fan. So that leaves the Saints. The team that the Husband has been pressing hard to the hoop to sell me on. I'm not opposed to the Saints, but I feel a little Band Wagon-ney. Post Katrina, Super Bowl Champs and all.
The Husband says I have until Noon today to make my decision. It's a lot of pressure. What say you football fans? Go back to my roots and pull for the 49'ers who I hope have their difficult years behind them or jump on the Saints bandwagon?

Can you make a case for another team? I'm all ears. 

Tuesday, September 04, 2012

But I Just... A 2-fer

Another example of undoing my hard work and in this case, wasting food.

But I just: Vacuumed.... and opened that box of cereal.

This is what was left after they tried to clean it up without me knowing. A for Effort?

Monday, September 03, 2012

We Look Like Melted Crayons.

Today was the big day. The Birmingham Color Run. It was a blast.

I have to say that when the storms woke me up this morning at 1am, I was thinking it wouldn't hurt my feelings if the whole thing was cancelled. In addition to not being a runner, I don't play in the rain. It's not a good look for me so I tend to avoid it at all cost. But today, once we got to the track where the race was being held, it was apparent that if I was going to participate in the "happiest 5k on the planet" I was going to have to play in the rain. Frizzy hair and all.

So, we embraced the constant rain and downpours and went with it and it was the most miserable fun I've ever had. We were soaked completely to our skivvies and our shoes squished when we walked but Boy! Was it fun!

Here is our day in pictures:

We did manage to get one good shot when we were all shiny and clean and the rain was just a drizzle.

Looking at the Radar at race time. No way around it, we knew we were going to get soaked.

Waiting on the race to start...

Some of the girls wanted to run a little. Some of us decided to take our time and document our 5k - Skipping, and dancing our way through the color zones..

 At the finish line!

I would do this again in a heartbeat. Rain and all. Although, I'm hoping for a dry experience next time. I won't lie.

 I'm also hoping that I'll stop picking rainbow boogers out of my nose in the very near future.

We Are Color Runners!

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

Fasten Your Seatbelts...

Whew! The first couple of days of first grade is under our belt and the Munchkin is in heaven. She loves her teacher and in addition to meeting some new friends, she is able to spend some time with her BFF's from last year.

A month or so ago the husband and I had a conversation with her about what after school/extra curricular activity she would like to do (while gently guiding her away from all things cheer and gymnastics. No offense but the thought of sitting through that several days a week makes me want to gouge my eyes with something sharp... or dull. Either way. Gouge my eyes.) She settled on swim team. I'm thrilled. She loves the water, it's something we can all be interested in and it's something she could actually do long term, if she likes it. Unlike gymnastics.

This week they are doing evaluations and it's every day after school. Not only have we been thrown into the reality of getting up and out every morning by 7:45, but now right after school we're changing, snacking and heading to the pool. Nothing like diving right in.. Ha!

Tonight, I accidentally put the twinlets to bed at 6:00, instead of 7:00. They were so tired at the dinner table I assumed it was later than it actually was. They didn't fight me, and were both asleep within 10 minutes. Poor little puppies aren't used to such a busy schedule.

Neither is Mommy.

Poolside Nap. It's tough being the little sister.

Tuesday, August 07, 2012

Summer. Day 73

Play in the sprinkler. Seems like such a simple thing, yet it's taken us until day 73 to mark this from our bucket list.

Minus the 7,364 bugs bites we got while playing outside, a great time was had by all!

Friday, August 03, 2012

Diamonds are a Girls Best Friend

This is another one of those posts that could have lots of names, it's also one I'm not really sure how to start.

While out running a quick errand last night, I was praising the girls for having played upstairs by themselves without fighting for more than 4 minutes 2 seconds. After having to go up a couple of times to get them settled, I got lost in doing some work. I would hear an occasional door slam or burst of giggles, but for the most part, they were quiet. As I look back on it now I realize it was probably too quite to have meant they were up to anything good.

So, back to the car ride. While praising them and asking them what they were playing upstairs, "Ashley" offers up something about the Munchkin getting the diamonds out of their butts. Whatever she said about this game just before and just after, got lost somewhere when I heard that thing about "diamonds and butts."

The Munchkin started shushing "Ashley" and if that's not a sure sign of something amiss, I don't know what is.. The conversation that followed went something like this...

Me: Diamonds in your bottom? What do you mean by diamonds?

Girls: Those little round things...

Me: What Round Things

Girls: Those things from the craft room that look like diamonds, blue diamonds.

Me: The blue sequins?

Girls: Yes

Me: Um.. Well...  In your bottom?

Girls: Yes

Me: Why would you put those in your bottom?

Ahsley: We didn't, Munchkin did

Munchkin: I DID NOT! I'm closing this conversation

Me: You don't close conversations, I do and I still need to know what is going on with these diamonds. Are they in your bottom now?

Girls: No

Ashley: Munchkin got them out

Munchkin: I DID NOT! I'm really done talking about this.

MaryKate: They might still be there, but I think they're not.

Me: Ok.. So where are these diamonds now?

Girls: In the Playroom...

Me: * Fighting the urge to cry or laugh or both, I passed them the bottle of Purell*

After arriving home and doing some investigating, I learned that the diamonds were not in fact sequins, they were clear decorative stones they found from some abandoned craft project. I also learned, thankfully that they didn't put them in their butt, but instead in their pants.

The game they were playing was "Poop Mail." They would "poop" a diamond into a piece of paper and deliver it through the mail slot on the Huge Playhouse in the playroom. There were probably 35 pieces of "mail" that had been delivered to that address.

Yeah. So how was your day?

Tuesday, July 31, 2012

As For Me and My House, We Will Eat Mor Zaxby's

It's been almost 2 weeks since Chick Fil A-gate and my social media continues to light up with people fighting over the issue, all while completely missing the issue, oddly enough.

I started this blog post in the heat of the moment and after much deleting and re-writing and calming down and re-writing and thinking about our beliefs and re-writing some more, I still feel strongly about the decision we have made to not support Anti-Gay Organizations via Chick Fil A.

The most persistent argument that has come my way for my decision is the " You can't possibly boycott every company that gives money to something you don't like.." and that is completely right. I can't. But I can support the things that I feel strongly about and right now that is the issue of Gay Rights. 10 years from now, I might feel strongly about saving monkeys in the rain forest and if that day comes, I'll do what little I can to support that cause too.

One day, when all of this is behind us and it will be eventually, just like women not having the right to vote and African Americans being sent to the back of the bus. This issue will eventually mainstream and I'll be proud to say that I did what little I could to show support for gay rights. Without people like me, the same people that were fighting for women and African Americans, where would we be?

I have no problem with anyone believing the way they choose to believe. I have a hard time understanding it in this case, admittedly. "The Hate the Sin, Love the Sinner" philosophy is lost on me. People say they have no problem with people being gay, they just don't deserve the same rights as a traditionally married couple. You have friends that are gay that you love and accept unconditionally, but... dot dot dot.

See, in our house, when we love and accept, there is no dot dot dot. It just is. It's what I'm teaching my kids. It's what your bible teaches you.

So, continue to support gay rights and/or Chick Fil A in the way that best suits your family and your conscience, but as for me and my family, we are doing what we feel we need to do to support those we know and love, we're doing what we feel is right.

Friday, July 27, 2012

I've Created a Monster (with 2 in training)

Harry Potter. It's what we're into.. Can you tell?

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Summer Fun: Day 41

We spent the 4th of July at the lake this year and managed to mark a few things off of our summer bucket list -- all while hanging with some of the Grandparents.

Go to the Lake:

Play in the Rain:

We also marked off fishing. Those pictures are stored on the Husbands phone and I keep forgetting to transfer..

We've got about a 2 1/2 weeks left to mark some serious tasks off the Bucket List - It's going to be a whirlwind 17 days!

Thursday, July 19, 2012


While getting ready this morning I had a conversation with one of the twinlets (Ashley to be exact) regarding boobies. Mine and hers.

Twinlet: "Mommy, you have big boobies"

Me: "Yeah well, it's all relative. And I'm a grown up."

Twinlet: "Well, when I get 17, I'm going to have Big O' Boobies"

Me: "17?"

Twinlet: "Uh Huh. 17 is when I'm a grown up. My Boobies will be bigger than yours. They'll be like this.... *motions to porn size boobs with her hands*

Twinlet: "When I'm 17.. a grown up" *shrugs*

Me: *Went ahead and locked her in the closet*

Wednesday, July 18, 2012

My Vow of Political Celibacy.

I'm a gal who loves her Social Media. Really, really loves her social media. If you know me, you know this to be true. I'm rarely without a social media source or outlet and start having the shakes when the place where I'm dining doesn't show up for me to check in or tag.

Lately my news feed has become a greater source of frustration than it has been an outlet of light-hearted fun. With about 4 months left until the BIG election, misinformation and the usual Obama hate is already at an all time high. I've reached my limit. You can only witness the defense of racism, and the war on women's rights for so long before feeling the need to punch someone in jeans.

I'm not a political person. At least I try not be. I know what I believe in, and what the Husband and I feel is best for our family. I don't push my views on others because it truly might not be best for them.  Hell, my beliefs now might not be what's best for me in 5 years.

I don't go on public message boards and call others names and question their intelligence because of their views. I respect their right to choose. (Ha!) I can be convinced that I am wrong, or at least that a compromise is desirable, if and/or when I'm dealing with reasonable opposing arguments.

Because we live here in the deep ass, conservative south, the majority of the people we know or are related to, do not share our views. Which begs the question, why do we continue to live in such a close minded, progressively challenged area, willingly... Sometimes I truly wonder what keeps us from fleeing to another part of the country, one that isn't so repressed and backwards. The thought of raising my children around such close minded idiocy, concerns me.

Lately Facebook has become an outlet for moronic forwards of misinterpretation and flat out hatred for the President of OUR United States. If you don't agree with his policy and you feel like he's "running this great Nation into the ground," that's fine. You're entitled to your opinion on the matter.  I actually love a good EDUCATED debate or discussion regarding my beliefs. I enjoy learning about why others believe the way they do. It makes me smarter, it challenges me to research and to learn. But it seems as though now, I spend my time trying to debunk the uneducated shit that flows out of some people's computers like a virus. Why? I'm not really sure. I don't expect to change their mind. But for some odd reason I feel the need to at least point them in the right direction and show them that not everything they read can be taken at face value. Red or Blue. There is no excuse for such anti-intellectualism.

But, no more. I'm done. I hesitate to make this vow because it's a long way until November, and if there is anything I love as much as my Social Media, it's Reality Television having the last word, but I'm going to do it. I'm going to give it my all. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.

So here it goes:

I vow to no longer engage with uneducated, misinformed people via social media. I will no longer give my time to a picture of Obama with horns. I will ignore and resign myself to my happy place.

You cannot bait me.

I am un-baitable.

In order to make things easier,  I will hide or delete anyone who posts something that I can prove to be false in less than one minute by doing a simple little search using this tool we call, Google. No offense, it goes along with my need to have the last word. This condition is a must.

When Obama wins in November, I vow not to gloat. A simple "Woo to the Hoo" should be sufficient in explaining my feelings.

Should Romney win, I will then un-hide the hidden, as I will most likely need Facebook in order to stay in contact with them when we flee the Country.

How about you, can you make your news feed a happy place again by taking this vow?

But, I just.... Put Those Away.

Welcome to a new series I'm calling "But, I just..."

I'm sure every Mom can relate to the issue that seems to be getting worse around our house. Me, the Mom, duplicating my cleaning efforts. As in, the tiny humans mess up faster than I can possibly clean.

Right now the Twinlets are hard core fashionistas. It's nothing for them to change their clothes 6 or 7 times a day. (do the math on that,  2 kids + 7 outfits each + whatever Munchkin happens to add in the mix = Lots of clothes.)

Because they can't actually hang things back up, we end up with piles and piles of clothes in their room.

After spending a good solid hour, sorting through what was clean or dirty, putting jammies back in the jammie drawer and hanging up the dresses, I walked in to find this:

A mere 2 hours after I had finished my chore.

The funny thing is, this was actually their attempt at helping by "folding them out" for me...  Hard to get upset about such cuteness.

Monday, July 09, 2012

Summer Fun On the Road and a Lesson Learned

We recently took a little trip up to see my sister in Lexington, it was on our list of things to do this summer, so it was a must. Plus I always look for a chance to see my sister!

On our trip we were able to really work our way through the bucket list. My children also learned a valuable lesson. The definition of "technicality."

Items we marked off:

Zoo - We took them to one of the best in the country. The Columbus Zoo
Ice Cream - Jeni's Spendid
Cupcake - Yum!
Hiking - McConnell Springs
Road Trip - Did it..
See MiMi and Jason - Check
Picnic - For Breakfast
Catch Fireflies - Only Killed One

And the pinnacle of our entire Summer Bucket List (and Lesson on the Definition of Technicality)


I'm guessing they will be a little more specific when creating our list for next summer.

Tuesday, July 03, 2012

Magic Mike: Not a good Movie. Not the Point

Thank you Sir, May I have another.
Last night we finally had the chance to check out the much hyped movie, Magic Mike.

All weekend I've watched status updates on Facebook of friends who had been. I had overheard conversations EVERYWHERE I went about THE movie.  In one conversation I heard at the mall, one lady was trying to explain to her customer how "good" it was, although it was a bit racy. Ya' Think?

2 things.

First. Between this movie and the hype over 50 Shades of Grey, I'm beginning to think that we, as women have been sexually repressed for a very long time. But that is another post for another day.

Second. What I keep hearing and reading is: "Was it Good?" Please stop asking that question. You're missing the point.

We didn't go see the movie for the riveting plot line. We went to see hot actors strip.


And in my ever so humble opinion, there wasn't enough of that because the directors felt that as women, we would want a plot. So, their feeble attempt to weave in a love story combined with the stripper brother spiraling out of control ended up taking away from the purpose of the movie.

To see hot actors strip.

So in answer to that question, "Was it good?"


Did I enjoy it?

You bet your Elephant Thong, I did.

Monday, June 18, 2012


When it comes to sleeping late, my kids just don't. The Munchkin would, but her sisters pretty much keep that from happening with the noise they make or the flat out walking in her room and jumping on her.

On Saturday, we had a busy day. We were up early for breakfast with the Father In Law, ran a couple of errands, came home and cleaned out the garage, then got ready for a party we were attending. The girls were especially hyper all day, and didn't nap.

We arrived at the party around 5:30pm and there was a massive bounce house. Perfect. Awesome. Thank You.

I was actually able to sit, have a drink and talk with other adults, all the while thinking they would play and exhaust themselves so much, they would actually sleep late the next morning.... Right. 

Here's your math equation -

5 Hours of Bouncing in a bounce house
Minus a Nap
Plus getting home at 11pm
Equals -  ONLY 45 extra minutes of sleep the next morning.

Somehow, that math does not add up. 

It did however result in a kick ass nap on Sunday, and if you're among the brave, you could try to double down and skip that nap in hopes of rolling that extra sleep over to the next morning. I'm not much of a gambler and decided to take the long nap.

It looks like 7:30am is going to have to qualify as "sleep late" on our bucket list.

FYI - They were up at 5:40am this morning. Who ARE these children?

Monday, June 11, 2012

Summer. Days 10 - 15

Whew! This whole summer bucket list thing is wearing me out. Last week we had a crazy busy week where we marked things off left and right!

Day 10 - We kicked the week off with a sleepover in Mommy and Daddy's room. 

Day 11 - Library. We spent 2 hours at the library playing and reading books. Check.

Day 12 - McWane, where we were able to mark off gift shop and buy a new toy. I love to multi-task. The new Dora and Diego exhibit is great and we even stopped by to check out the new summer science studio. The Junior league of Birmingham is staffing it, and in making small talk with the girls one of the ladies asked them if they had ever been to McWane before.. To which the Munchkin looked appalled and replied.. "Uh, Yeah. My picture is on the side of the building." Duh!

She's not lying.

Day 13 - We picked strawberries. A first for me and the girls, and we had an absolute blast. It's pretty near the end of the season and my strawberries didn't fare so well after about a day, but it was worth the money on the experience alone, highly recommend this!

Day 14 - Movies - Gotta love the free and discounted movies that come along with summertime!

Day 15 - Took us back to the pool, but after a week that full, a little more fun in the sun and water was a welcome activity!

Thursday, June 07, 2012


Today started out great. I woke up a little short on patience, but we had a fun day planned with Oma and were marking things off of our bucket list, so I put on my patience hat and pressed on.

The movie was great, so great that I decided it would be a great day to take the kids for a hair cut. They were all overdue, and the thought of spending one more night brushing through the tangles in their hair after a day at the pool, was enough to make me want shave them all bald.

Our usual guy wasn't there, which was to be expected since I was so spur of the moment. I let a girl with flaming red hair and top of the foot tattoos have at them. No longer caring so much about f'ing up the twins curls. Desperate Times, people.

While the Munchkin was in the hot seat, "Mary Kate" was perusing the OPI display, completely sucked in by the pretty colors. I told her (per usual) "Look, Don't Touch!" She, agreed. (also, per usual.)

While I was watching the girl cut Munchkin's hair, I failed to realize that the one "Looking" at the nail polish had started "Touching" the nail polish.. She also began "Spinning" the nail polish. So fast, in fact that they spun right off the display, along with one of the shelves, into a huge OPI Atomic Orange mess, All. Over. Everything. The floor. The counters. The rest of the display. All of the things that fell off of the display. All of the un-broken bottles from the display. Me. You name it. It was covered.

As I relentlessly wiped and scrubbed the polish off the floor (to no avail,) all I could think of was how this $45 dollar set of hair cuts was now going to cost a fortune in OPI nail polish and clean up.  The funds for "My Moms Night Out Dinner" was in jeopardy. And as you can so clearly see, not something I could afford to give up.

Once the polish settled, so to speak, it appeared that only one bottle broke, and the shelf was fixable, enough. With my sense of humor and my girls charm and sheer cuteness, we managed to get out of there with nothing more than a big tip.

Which is good because I was prepared to trade the child.

Tuesday, June 05, 2012

Slow White and the Hot Huntsman

I had super high hopes for Snow White and the Hunstman. I'm not a fan of Kristen Stewart, she tends to ruin everything she's in, in my ever so humble opinion, but I thought the movie looked like a winner, nonetheless.

We were so excited to see the movie that we ventured out on opening night, something I rarely do. I, along with many friends had been looking forward to this movie for about a year, my sister was in town and it seemed like a good excuse for margaritas and a movie.

What a snooze fest. Charlize Theron, I thought did an amazing job. She yelled a lot and seemed bored during parts, but all in all, played a great villian-ess. Kstew was pretty much Bella with a sometimes accent. The choice for Hunstman was yummy and I could eat him up, but didn't really care for William.

We all know the story of Snow White, so this adaptation needed to do something to keep the momentum going, it didn't. It was slow and so many of the scenes with Kstew threw me back to the scenes she ruined in the Twilight movies.
  • Getting tossed around by the wicked queen: See Ballet Studio with Bad Vampire, James
  • Being poisoned by the apple: See Venom spreading after James the Vampire bit her. 
  • Laying in the grass: See Meadow Scene
  • Laying in a poisoned apple coma: See Vampire Transition from Breaking Dawn
  • The queen making her watch while her guard died: See Volturi in Eclipse with Edward getting tossed around. 
She wakes up from a slumber, never acknowledging who laid down "Loves One True Kiss." Didn't she care who actually woke her up? She goes on to "inspire" an entire village with a speech so lacking in enthusiasm, she would be hard pressed to inspire the cast of Biggest Loser to eat a pizza.

Also, there should have been some sex. When a Hunstman rips your dress to pieces, some sexy time better follow. That "chemistry" went absolutely nowhere.

On the positive, the scenery, costumes and visuals were pretty stunning.

Have you seen the movie? What did you think?

Thursday, May 31, 2012

Summer. Day 7

This could easily be labeled the "Day of Summer Fun that Almost Wasn't."

After promising and pumping the girls up for a movie date this morning, I realized that I got my dates wrong and was looking ahead by a week. Not very comforting when considering it's my job to know what's going on in Birmingham and when.

After sighs and "Awww Mom's" I offered up the McWane Center as a replacement, which was of course received with Cheers all around. Yay, Me. Plus it's on our bucket list, so we were still going to be able to mark something off.

Fast forward one hour, we're dressed, and walking into McWane, excited to play animal rescuer in the New Dora and Diego Exhibit.

Fast forward 30 minutes more, and you would see me noticing that my child was doing a very urgent Potty Dance, while refusing to relinquish control of Baby Jaguar. As it sunk in that she would rather pee in her pants than hand over that stuffed animal, I saw the pee start trickling down her leg. I grabbed her up, yelled for the other 2, while flipping her legs up to stop the pee from hitting the floor and closing down the exhibit.. You're welcome.

Unfortunately, staying wasn't an option. We packed it up (ever so thankful for a membership!) and headed home.

We cleaned up, changed clothes and consulted the Summer Bucket List for something else to do. After explaining (again) that we would not be riding a dolphin today, I did what every good Mommy would have done and picked an activity that happened to be 2 minuets from a Starbucks.

After a "coffee drink" for Mommy, we had a great time playing at Wald Park - all was not lost.

Color Me Badd

I might have officially lost my brain.

It was brought to my attention that The Color Run 5k is coming to Birmingham in September. Being that I've been wanting acting like I want to run a Warrior Dash (because it sounds cool.) I thought this color run would be an easier transition into crazy-ass-sports-stories-that-will-be-good-blog-fodder.  Plus starting out on a run without the fire and obstacle course sounded more appealing, and considering I can't even run to the mailbox without hyperventilating, I thought it might be a better idea than going balls to the wall with a Warrior Dash.

The only catch is you come out at the finish line looking like Rainbow Brite.

I've gathered a few friends and we've created a team, I'm oddly excited considering 2 major things:

1. I hate to run
2. I hate getting dirty

Other than that, it's going to be awesome!

Friday, May 25, 2012

Summer. Day 1

I have to say we started the summer off with a great day of fun and I managed to exhaust my children so much that they didn't even have the energy to mark anything off of our bucket list when we got home.

I feel certain we could mark several things off from today, but "Go to the Pool" will definitely get a check.

My Ladies