Thursday, August 14, 2008

Oh Sweet Jesus!

Today was just one of those days. I've been really busy trying to get ready for our trip and the Munchkin has been busy being, well, a toddler. We made a trip to Sam's today to stock up on the essentials, diapers, formula and a big ass bag of peanut M&M's. I knew I could get in and out of the store in 15 minutes, I was focused and in the zone, but because I had the twins with me, everyone wanted to "peek" at them. One older couple stopped me and started up a conversation. No biggie, I give them the run down....

Both girls -
Identical -
5 months old -
"Mary Kate & Ashley" -

Only problem with this conversation was that the elderly gentleman was talking through a hole in his throat, into one of those voice box thingys (yes, that is the PC term.) I was doing well understanding him, his wife was translating some, my problem came when I saw the wheels turning in the Munchkins head... At first she wasn't sure where the "noise" was coming from. She was looking up, to the left, to the right and I was trying my best to continue talking to this nice couple while trying to figure out how to head off a very inquisitive 2 1/2 year old. I could see it happening in slow motion, she finally located the source and began to stare. I continued to talk thinking maybe she wouldn't be able to get a word in, no such luck. She says to the man, "Where are you talking from?" "What's that thing?" the man didn't hear her, but as the lady was walking off, she made mention that she thought the Munchkin was curious about the way her husband was talking, I smiled politely and said "yes ma'am" We'll have to sit down and have a conversation about how some people talk in different ways...." What the F*@K... sit down and talk about how different people speak? That's the best I could do? I might as well have been the toddler there. People of different colors, I can handle. People in a wheelchair? Bring it on, but a man that speaks through a hole in his throat?? Come On! I have never in my 33 years spoken to someone like that, rarely even see them, and my first encounter comes with a 2 year old in tow. Life is a cruel joke sometimes!


ShelbyAnne said...

LOL!! Oh no!! And seriously, what do you say?

"Honey, sometimes people get CANCER and the doctors have to CUT their vocal cords OUT OF THEIR THROAT"

How do you say that nicely to a toddler?

*Yankee Belle* said...

I was 10. We were at a friend of a friend's house. The old man had one of those things. I still - to this day - rem him. He sounded like Darth Vader. I was taught not to stare, but I was transfixed on the hole in his neck.

Madie's Mom said...

I couldn't help it..this made me laugh out loud! I think you handled the situation like a pro. I'm not sure if I could have been that quick on my toes.

HM said...

This is sooooo something I would do. I think when adults have childrens, parts of their mind get all out of whacked! I'm sure they understood and even smiled as they walked away!

Kelly said...

Ha! Ha! Ha! You know, there are some things in life you're never prepared for no matter how considerate you try to be. In my career, I've worked with people with every kind of disability, but I still fumbled when a guy extended his hand to shake mine and I realized that instead of a hand, he had a hook!

I actually pulled my hand back for a second in shock and alarm! How parochial is that?!?

I've been told I have a horrible poker face, and I'm still embarrassed by what my face must have looked like when I shook his hook (and the fact that that rhymes seems incredibly un-PC, but there you have it.)