Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Clearing the Air

So, many of you know that I organize a fairly large group of SAHM's. I love this group. I love seeing new Moms come in, and seeing the ladies pull together to give advice and create friendships that hopefully will last way longer than this group ever will.

Recently we had some drama, MAJOR drama.. all regarding the subject of home birthing, pros/cons, whatever. I will leave it at that, as many of the members read this blog... I think. Anyway, after pulling together some research, I am of the opinion that home birthing is not a safe way to bring a child into this world... (My opinion and before you leave me a comment, you better have the balls to use your name) So things were said, feelings were hurt and people as a result, made the decision to leave the group... Although, instead of telling me, they went on to their own website, and ran their yap about how they no longer wanted to be a part of MLOB. So, I removed them. I was actually feeling a little guilty and regretful for the way things went down. I don't want people to have a negative opinion of anything that I'm associated with or in charge of. Then, I found out that not only were they not "man" enough to just take themselves out of the group, but they are referring to my group and members in ways that are not polite. They even refer to us as "The Biting Moms." Nice little pet name that I'm sure if you think back you can figure out. These are all things that came to light during the whole saga, and continue on now.

So, we don't parent our children in the same way that the "crunchy moms" do (their label, not mine) But, really? Name calling? How old are you? I didn't birth my kids in a tub, I took advantage of all the drugs they would give me, the twins never touched a nipple and they are happy healthy babies that I would put up against any of theirs ANY DAY!!! They need to grow up, get over it, and stay the hell out of my group. It has been made apparent that the only reason for joining our group was to cause trouble and criticize our parenting techniques.

Happy home birthing...

14 comments:

random_mommy said...

I understand what you're saying. Parenting is so hard, and I think all the moms in our group are trying to do it well. We are all putting thought and love into it. It upsets me when some people subtly need to affirm their choices by knocking ours. I've met the kids in our group, and they're wonderful! Isn't that all that counts?!? Shouldn't we all have a common goal, no matter what we choose to feed them, or where we choose to have them?
Nice rant, thanks for sharing!

random_mommy said...

oh, and for the record, I'm not talking about anyone specific--- I'm speaking in general terms.

Catwoman said...

Don't you hate it when high school pettiness makes its way into Mommy groups. I mean, at what point do people outgrow that?

So people disagreed with your opinion, fine. But really? To the point that they can't be friends with you or part of the group? I mean, come on! That's what makes the world great, the different opinions in it, and you're allwed yours like they are allowed theirs.

Maybe I'm too even keeled, I don't know, but except for things like pedophilia or other extremes like that, I can't imagine being that way...

Way I look at it, if they're willing to turn their back on you and those of you who end up showing their true colors and sticking by you, then they're probably not worthy of your friendship anyway.

Hot Mamma said...

I hate people who only can see their opninion and that is the only opinion ever. It pisses me off to no end. I don't care if someone births their child in a bath or barn, I would just prefer to birth my in a hospital bed with lots of doctors and drugs...just me. I used to work with a lady that was a COMPLETE Democrat (Politics, I know?) and if you disagreed with her on any view, God help you because she would chew you up and spit you out. People!

Heather S. said...

"The Biting Moms" huh??? Well, I guess that's my fault. That's what I get for putting myself out there. Let me say for the record that I am reaaaaallly pissed off about that one. If I EVER find out who said that they'll have hell to pay! I will raise my kids the way I see fit and if people don't like me or this group then to hell with them. Oh, and my child hasn't bitten anyone since she got a taste of her own medicine. It worked for me! What really makes me mad is that I NEVER made a negative home-birthing comment.I don't judge anyone for their choices and I would like to belive that others would be as respectful. I mean really, who's a perfect parent?? oooooooh, I'm so mad!
Sorry for the rant!

Princess Motormouth said...

Ta-daw! I think there are way too many chics who just thrive off negativity & drama. I'm a Mom, I don't know you, but we have a mutual friend. So, I don't technically think that I'm a cyber stalker, but I'd lover to be in your group. Except I'm not a SAHM, but dang sure wanna be! So does that count, sorta?

My 2 girls never breast fed either and I'm the one that's the sicky-not them!

I think those of you who try to make parenting look so darn easy are just a bunch of "Best Parent Ever wannabes."

So, take that you Crunchy Moms, whoever you are!

I'm a Mom!..? said...

Heather S... for the record you aren't the only one that they called out (and it wasn't by name, only incidents) Anyway, when this was brought to my attention, it fueled the fire for me to get pissed off again, mainly because of the negativity they are putting on our group members that never made comments about the HB issue. It just proved to me that they are trouble makers.. Don't mess with my ladies, people....

random_mommy said...

I sooooo HEART Heather S.

Whoever did that... it's so mean. Heather is a great mom who is probably one of THE nicest people in our group. She took a risk to gain some knowledge, and someone exploited that.

Please apologize to her.

Poodlehead said...

apparently you and I are both feeling the fire on the same day.

Anonymous said...

Maybe the people you are referring to were just trying to make new friends. Maybe they weren't trying to cause trouble. And why are you the Biting Moms? And what's so wrong with homebirthing? I had a great home/water birth.

Yankee Belle said...

You know you dont want me to get 'fired' up again. =P

Nathan's Mommy said...

I say good riddance. Don't let the door hit you on the way out. And good luck if you ever come upon a parenting problem or behavior that is difficult to handle.

Kim said...

i believe in karma. what goes around, comes around. they just need to be careful and worry about their own lives.

Shelby said...

You poor dear. I'm sorry other mommies on the playground are pulling your hair (thought I'd stick with the grade-school mentality, haha). You're right though, grow up. If you can't be an adult, you have you business raising a child.

As for parenting...I sort of feel like it's one of those things that everyone does to their own best ability, including that nut job from Florida who sort of kind of maybe knows where her 2 y/o is. I digress.

Parenting seems to be a very personal thing, and something that I think should be left to individuals and not judged.

I would be a proud member of any of your groups any day of the week. =)