Saturday, September 08, 2007

5-0 Bitches!!

To all of my friends that are Alabama fans, I will apologize to you now, this does not apply to you...

What is it with these redneck Alabama fans? I do not walk around spewing verbal vomit at you about how much I hate your team. I may have been named by some of our friends as The Worlds Most Obnoxious Auburn Fan, but I will never harass you unprovoked in the grocery store line.

Tonight, I ran up to the store to get a couple of things before the game started. I was of course wearing my Auburn shirt and hat. While standing in the line, the Cashier, who is wearing a Crimson Tide T-shirt, tells me I should go get in line with her sister over there, pointing to another Cashier wearing an Auburn shirt. I look over and smile, then the man in front of me turns around and decides to join in on the fun. Telling me I should figure it out and change my colors, again I smile. He continues on, asking if I would ever learn..and some other bull shit that I was trying very hard to ignore. Finally after listening to them snicker and blab on, I said, "I'm sorry, am I making you uncomfortable? You want me to learn what? How to beat you for a sixth time in a row? "War Eagle Sir."

As he was walking away, he turned and said, "Oh no she didn't just say they were going to beat us again this year," "Yes sir," I say again, "War Eagle" He laughs and heads out of the store. My first thought was to tackle him from behind and beat him over the head with my People Magazine. Realizing that would be both ineffective and considered assault, I hold my place in line.

F - You, Mother F'er!!!! I HATE ALABAMA..... YOU SUCK! Have a little bit of class. Is that even possible? I was just standing there, minding my own business, trying to buy my milk and skinny cows. Grrrr... Go to hell.

7 comments:

Kristy Woodward said...

Same thing happened to my mother-in-law as she was leaving the mall one day. Random guy was driving through the parking lot and stopped in front of her and asked if she was a bammer fan. She said "No...War Eagle". He then said "Well I'm a Tennessee fan and you guys will be lucky to win two games this year" and then he sped off...hopefully right off the nearest cliff. Keep in mind my MIL was on her lunch break, wearing business attire...not looking the least bit like a football fan. Needless to say she was left stunned, pondering what idiot would do such a thing! I really wonder about some people.

TaraKy said...

I think sometimes U of A at T fans are from a different world. You a better person than me. I think I probably would have mouthed off a little more and chose never to shop at the grocery store again. However, that what sets us apart from them...we have class and they just think they do...

Mommapeas said...

Um, I'm sorry, you're apology holds no weight for me. I have met my fair share of RED & LOW-CLASS Auburn & Alabama fans in my little lifetime. Frankly, I'm apalled that 'all' U of A fans and are being lumped together in post. Shame, shame.

Oh, and it's just football. (delicately wispering 'Roll Tide')

Oh did I mention that the one time I stayed in Auburn I woke up with a cow in the back window of the TRAILER? Moo M-f**ker.

Mommapeas said...

I would like to clarify that I take full responsibility for all of our "less than desirable fans" it comes with the territory when you live here and graduated from there. Peace out.

Anonymous said...

Being 0-2 now doesnt help either.

I'm a Mom!..? said...

0-2???? Are we watching the same sport/team?

"MommaDrool" said...

I bet Angie could have tackled that guy in the grocery store better than some of our AU guys did last weekend :)